Little Sisters Have No Fun
by AquaDreamingz
Summary: Plots, deaths, betrayal, and humor: The story of Lady Lily, the forgotten sister of Maid Marion. And her way of dealing with it.
1. Alone in the Forest

**Little Sisters Have No Fun  
Chapter 1: Alone in the Forest  
By: AquaDreamingz **

**Author's Note:**_ As you've probably noticed, this chapter has been revised. I suggest you reread it as it develops the characters more than the original draft. Thank you and remember to read and review. Your input is highly appreciated. Especially if something is historically inaccurate. _

**Disclaimer:** I stake no claim on Robin Hood or any of the characters associated with him. My original characters have no existence outside of the author's imagination and this story. They have no relation whatsoever to anyone bearing the same name or names. They are not even distantly inspired by any individual known or unknown to the author, and all incidents are pure invention. This disclaimer stands for all the chapters in this story. 

: 

A young girl named Lily carefully pushed her way through the deep foliage of Sherwood Forest. She looked around herself every once in awhile but with the dense trees and shrubs it was hard. Silently she cursed her sister of whom she was looking for. Marion, for that was her sister's name, had gone missing or rather she'd run off again. The latter was the one Lily would bet her money on. Finally, the trees thinned to their normal density and she could easily walk like an ordinary person again. Against her normal attitude, Lily was worried about Marion and that made her determined to discover where Marion had been disappearing to. And what she was doing. Mischief and mayhem were Lily's jobs not the jobs of her upstart of a sister. 

But a girl did have a right to be worried about her sister what with that thief, Robin Hood, running around. Sure she had heard all the wonderful stories about him stealing from the rich and giving to the poor, but stealing was still stealing and good intentions didn't erase the deed. 

Lily moved stealthily. Her leather slip-ons were perfect for trekking through the forest. She had_ borrowed_ them from a lord's son who didn't deserve them anyways. He had been quite rude to her and in an argument, determined to get his way, he said, "At least, I have two parents." Lily, still in mourning after her mother's death a couple of years before the event, had punched him and taken his shoes so she could run away into the forest to hide. She had every intention of returning them. Needless to say, that betrothal hadn't lasted very long. It was a low blow anyways. 

Time passed slowly as she wandered through the woods, her thoughts still focused on her sister. Marion and Lily used to be close. When they were children, they used to play together in the fields with their dolls and reenact tales of princes and princesses. Those were the good old days. It was easier then. That time before Marion had discovered boys and they discovered her. 

A noise startled her out of her thoughts and daydreams. Her head shot up hoping to catch sight of Marion or as the villagers called her: Maid Marion, for her thoughtful deeds and caring nature. For her ability to not judge people and being considerate to everyone while still maintaining the proper etiquette of someone of her station. 

Lady Lily on the other hand was called so jokingly. She never acted of her station. She still played with the children of the village her manor lorded over. While she too was well liked by the villagers, she was never held in that high of respect. She was considered one of their own but the elders liked to reminded people that she was still in fact a lady. Lily frowned. All she ever wanted was to fit in and she did. At least, when the fact that she was a lady was forgotten in a game but she could never just sit and talk with the others or gossip about boys because then it would all too painfully, and quickly, become obvious that she was not like them. 

Oh right, that noise. She returned to her search, moving closer to the source of that sound. Just what would be waiting for her? She hoped it wasn't a bear! 

:

**Written: September 9, 2002**

**Revised: April 28, 2004 **_(Took me long enough!)_


	2. Well I Found Them

** Little Sisters Have No Fun**  
**Chapter 2: Well, I Found Them…  
By: AquaDreamingz **

**Author's Note:**_ This chapter, too, is revised! Yeah! Once again thanking Chrissy and my other friends for telling me to get my butt in action. Also I'm in Europe right now so as you can guess I'm a bit busy and internet access is hard to come by. (I left the 12th of June.)_

:_  
_

She moved forward, quietly as possible as not to scare off or make whatever made that noise attack her. A few more quick steps led her to clearing where soft voices drifted back to where she had hidden herself behind a thick, tall oak tree.

"Morning, Robin," a delicate woman's voice greeted to a companion. Lily could see neither but quickly identified the voice as her sister Marion's. Now all that was left was figuring out who this 'Robin' person was. Hopefully it would be a girl because then she could probably enter the clearing without being strangled by her sister… as much.

"Good morning, my lady," replied a male voice. _Damn._

Full of curiosity, Lily moved so that she could see who Marion was having a secret rendezvous with in the forest. She could hardly believe who it was. She would recognize that face anywhere what with all those wanted posters everywhere. Sure the posters weren't all that accurate and he looked much stupider in the posters. But that was probably the sheriff's doing anyways. He was a stupid bawdy, hell-hated lout. The worst part was that he fancied Marion. Can you imagine having that boil-brained brute in the family? Horrid.

Despite the natural distrust of the man, Lily could see why Marion would like him. She obviously liked him; otherwise she wouldn't be out in the middle of Sherwood with him, an outlaw. Robin Hood was handsome. He looked as though he would always be cheerful in a laid back kind of way. Also, it was no wonder he hadn't been caught yet, Robin was dressed in all green that was so close to the natural colors of the wood that he just kind of faded from sight unless you were really looking or knew what to look for. On top of his sandy brown hair was a green cap with a long feather in it. Lily supposed he was kind of cute if you liked that rugged type.

Marion leaned up and gave Robin a kiss on the cheek. Lily reared back and gasped a startled 'Eww!' I mean, who really wants to see their sister kiss.

Robin immediately stopped paying attention to Marion and scanned the surroundings. Lily practically threw herself behind a tree. He frowned and reached for a hunting horn that was hanging on his waist. Bringing it to his lips, he blew and a few seconds later, men dressed in the same style as Robin appeared.

"Spread and search," came Robin Hood's voice as Lily pressed herself farther against the oak and though she could disappear into it.

_I am so screwed when Marion finds out I've been spying on her. Oh and that whole outlaw thing won't help either._

A big fellow, Lily recognized from songs, tales, and wanted posters as Little John, came upon her in a few minutes. Peering down at her from bushy eyebrows, he made a slight sound of surprise.

"Found 'im, Robin," he called though his eyes never left hers as she looked up at him. Slowly she started inching away but before she had moved but a few inches he had lifted her up rather easily and became to take shockingly graceful steps back to the clearing.

And towards her sister.

"I'm going to die," she mumbled dismayed.

"I'm not going to hurt you, little one," said the giant misunderstanding.

She frowned up at him, "Oh no, I'm worried about her."

He frowned confused but lumbered on. "It's just a little girl," he called to Robin as she hung from his grip.

Marion gasped at the sight of Lily. "You little giglet!"

"You know her?" questioned Robin looking amused.

"She's my sister!" she gasped.

Little John smiled down at Lily, understanding of her earlier comment. "Little rascal, aren't you?"

"You followed me," Marion continued to rave. "You have some explaining to do!"

Little John set Lily down as she bubbled over in angry. "**Me?!** _I_ have explaining to do? I'm not the one in the forest that no one without permission from the king is allowed to enter I might add, with a band of notorious outlaws!"

The two sisters glared at each other, ready to tear each other to pieces. Neither of them really understood why but such is the world of sisterhood.

The outlaws backed up. An unmistakable tension filling the air as the two sisters faced off, mouths ready for verbal combat and brain ready for the battle of wits that was sure to follow.

**Written: Unknown **_(Long, long ago, in a galaxy far, far away…)_****

**Revised: June 8, 2004 **


	3. Cat Fights and Private Parts

**Little Sisters Have No Fun  
Chapter 3: Cat Fights and Private Parts  
By: AquaDreamingz **

**_Author's Note: _**_In reply to _Random Person_, Marion is the correct way of spelling her name. I checked in the old Robin Hood book I have (it used to be my Grandmother's) so I am inclined to think that that is the correct version of the story._

:_  
_

"What is your problem?" Marion screamed, eyes flashing.

"My problem? I'm not the one with a problem," Lily retorted.

Marion gave a disbelieving laugh. "Right, you don't have problems and I'm going to marry the sheriff of Nottingham," Marion said, the sarcasm laid on real thick.

One of the outlaws, a real genius, coughed out, "But I thought you and Robin..."

Lily rolled her eyes, "Yes, I can see why you sneak out so often. The people here are so enlightened."

Marion ignored her sister and gently said to the outlaw who spoke, "dear, it was sarcasm. That means I say one thing but mean the opposite."

"Oh, okay, Marion," said the big outlaw as he turned a light shade of red. "Just making sure you weren't going to leave us. We do enjoy your company."

"Almost as much as Robin," some other outlaw called out amidst the murmurs of agreement to the previous comment. A couple of hoots followed by Robin Hood yelling at everyone to 'Shut the bloody hell up or I'll give you to Nottingham' and Marion blushing profusely.

Lily coughed, "Now if you're all done, I'd like to get back to yelling at my sister." She paused, "All right then... What were you thinking? Are you absolutely nuts? You're out in a forbidden forest with a band of notorious outlaws. And everyone thinks that **I** am the insane one. Bah." She huffed and glared at Marion, daring her to speak.

Marion rose to the challenge, "You are a spoiled 13 year old delinquent and you think that you can tell me what to do."

"Spoiled!? Not nearly as much as you, o perfect one. I'll enjoy telling Father that you're just as bad as me. Worse, even! I don't hang out with outlaws." Lily grinned evilly and turned to leave.

Robin, with a quick glance at Little John, had the big man standing in Lily's way. The girl glared up at the man and rather shortly commanded to him to 'Move out of my way right this instance!'

"Sorry, little missy, can't do that. It'll be the noose for us if you tell."

"Do you have any idea who you're dealing with?" When Little John didn't move, Lily brought her heel down on his foot, catching him by surprise. Taking her chance, Lily made a mad dash to the forest beyond the clearing.

Robin Hood quickly turned to his men, "Bring her back! Lady Lily, Maid Marion and I need to come to a compromise." With that the men took off and faded into the surrounded green.

Marion glanced worriedly after them.

Robin Hood wrapped an arm around her, "Don't worry, they won't hurt her."

She smiled up at him, "I'm not worried about that. I'm more worried about her hurting them."

Robin smiled, as he did not understand. "That seems unlikely to happen."

She sighed, "We'll see."

He pulled her closer to himself. "I don't what I'd do without you," he mumbled from his position of smelling her hair.

"Thank you."

"For what?" Robin questioned.

"Everything," Marion eyes fluttered as the two leaned in for a kiss.

A throat clearing from the edge of the clearing made the two jump away from each other. The two quickly looked in opposite directions while blushed deeply. Lily groaned and made gagging noises from her spot, which turned attention to her. Two men were holding Lily in front of them. The others were glancing worriedly at the girl. The reason became clear as another two men entered holding up a third who was clutching his more private areas.

"I see," Robin murmured to Marion, now understanding her earlier concern. "Well, uh, I understand that you think I'm an evil man who robs every fat, rich pig I see. But I'm here to clear that opinion of me from you."

"Try, little man," Lily glared while struggling against the men holding her.

"Lily," Marion glared at her. "Robin is just trying to be nice."

"Marion, its okay. Lily, I have a proposition to make," Robin Hood smiled. "I hear that you like to have a good ol' _mischievous _time."

"And what did you have in mind?" Lily asked, interested despite herself.

"Oh, I don't know, what's your idea of fun?'

"Making Marion and her boyfriend miserable," Lily replied without missing a beat.

Robin laughed. "Well, keep our secret and I'll make sure you don't stay bored."

"I agree on a trial basis," Lily said with a smirk.

"So is that a yes?" Marion asked breathlessly.

"Sure. Whatever."

"Yes!" Marion grinned up at Robin.

"Oh bother, I'm going soft," Lily grumbled.

**Written: Unknown **

** Revised: September 25, 2004**


	4. Just Relations

**Little Sisters Have No Fun!  
Chapter 4: Just Relations  
By: AquaDreamingz**

**Author's Note:**_Just would like to thank my editor Chrissy once again!_

:_  
_

Marion walked briskly through the dense forest on the narrow deer path she knew led back to Ravenskeep Manor. Lily skipped next to her and looked up.

"Whatcha mad at?" Lily glanced over at her sister's ridged face.

Marion replied tightly, "I am not mad."

"Liar. I can tell when you're mad. You're mad. Why?" Lily continued to bounce around.

The reply was a dark growl, "I am not angry!"

Lily shrugged, "Kay! Kay!" Marion glared at the younger teenager. The girl just smiled in return.

After an hour of relatively silent travel, they found the edge of the wood and walked quickly and quietly into their home. Or at least Marion did. Lily, on the other hand, could be compared to an elephant stumbling down a steep slippery slope after a particularly heavy rain.

"Can you be quiet?" Marion hissed, her headache growing with every shout and giggle. She could just imagine her father discovering them in the forest. She'd never be able to sneak away again. 'Perhaps that is Lily's plan,' she mused.

Lily peeked at her sister and retorted, "Huh?"

Marion raised her voice, "Be quiet."

A puzzled look crossed her face, "Speak up."

The older sister glared, "Shut up."

"I can't hear you."

Marion still managed a whisper but louder, "Shut up."

"Marion, I cannot hear you!"

"Shut the hell up!" screamed Marion as she lost it.

Lily looked at Marion shocked, "You must be more quiet, Marion. Someone could hear you!"

Marion stared in disbelief, "Why you . . . I ought to." She lunged to strangle her. But Lily was already running toward Ravenskeep.

"Daddy," the girl yelled and was swept into a hug by the man who was waiting.

Marion's eyes narrowed, "One of these days, I'm going to rip out your tongue and feed it to the wolves, and then maybe you will finally **shut up**!" She suddenly seemed self-conscious as she hurried toward her sister and father. She swept into a curtsey and muttered, "Father."

"Daddy!" Lily squealed as she hugged him again.

"Where were you two?"

"You know, just out. Doing sister things." Lily smiled easily.

Marion let out a sigh of relief, 'so, she's not _that_ stupid. Thank the Lord.'

"Good! Good! Well, I do believe that I have news for you!" the man smiled graciously.

"Good or bad?" Lily immediately asked.

Marion was interested as well, "What's the news, Father?"

"Good news. Your cousin Alfred is back from the Crusades!"

"My Cousy Alfred!"

After days and weeks and a very long wait, 'Cousy' arrived. He rode up to Ravenskeep and strode into the main room where the family was sitting.

"Hello!" Alfred beamed.

Marion nodded her head in greeting, "Alfred."

Father rose and shook his hand, "Nephew! Good to see you!"

Lily, on the other hand, ran up to him as fast as her petticoats would allow and hugged him, "Cousy!"

Alfred struggled with his breathing while managing to blurt out, "Lily." Said girl released her strangle hold and grinned up at him. "Well, it's nice to see you all," he said when he finally recovered.

Lily smiled. 'What can I do to my 'guest' now?' She smirked and Alfred looked warily at her.

**Written: Unknown**

**Revised: December 16, 2004 **


	5. Deadly Connection

**Little Sisters Have No Fun  
Chapter 5: Deadly Connection  
By: AquaDreamingz**

Lily hummed as she skipped down the passageway to the kitchen looking for an afternoon snake. Her purple dress flounced along with her as she held up the obstacle so she could go faster. She grinned as she walked into the kitchen.

"Paprika!" she called looking around for the missing chef. "Paprika?" Frowning slightly Lily turned to leave the cooking area when she heard voices coming from the parlor that was two rooms down. The noise sounded like an argument and Lily didn't want to be left out. She slipped silently out of the room and down the hallway.

Crouching in front of the door, Lily pressed her ear to the thick oak door. That didn't help so she moved down the wall to a thinning piece. She leaned against the structure and listened.

"This family has connections to Robin Hood!" a first said as softly as possible due to the intense, obvious anger.

"There is no proof," a second, more familiar voice replied just as tightly.

"Find some," replied the first voice. "Robin Hood is becoming more and more of a nuisance. Prince John is not pleased. Also if they get King Richard's ransom, Prince John will lose his claim to the throne. Richard will return home and see what has gone on here. We will all suffer."

"Surely Robin Hood could not be that much of a problem," the second voice said sounding quite worried.

"Yes, he can. In fact, he is becoming a hero to the people. The last thing we need is a hero. It could turn into a revolt. Find the facts. Now."

"Yes. Yes, I will," the second voice hurriedly answered.

"Good. Now, get to work. That kid looks talkative. I'll bet she'll know. Marion is too good natured to pose a threat but just to be safe, kill the whole lot of them when you get the information."

"Kill? No problem," the second voice said wickedly.

Lily slid down the wall. 'I'm going to die,' she wailed in her head. 'This isn't fair. I still young. I have a life to live. I never even had my first kiss. Life is so cruel. This is all Marion's fault! If she didn't have an outlaw for a boyfriend, my life wouldn't be at stake.' Lily's eyes were wide as she continued to rant mentally. A silently more logical thought took over, 'I have to tell Father. Marion. But I have no proof. Nor do I know who was in there talking.'

She quickly went down the hallway to the next room where she hid herself near the door and watched through it. She knew that the voices, the murders, would have to come this way to leave the house.

Finally footsteps replaced the voices and Lily knew they were coming. She held her breath as she waited for the figures to come into sight. A sharp intake of air pressed into her lungs as she saw the ones who had plotted her doom a mere seconds previously.

'It can't be!'

**Written: Unknown **

**Revised: June 13, 2005**


	6. Hyperventilation

**Little Sister's Have No Fun  
Chapter 6: Hyperventilation  
By: AquaDreamingz**

**-:- **

Lily widened her eyes in horror as she saw the ones who plotted her death and the deaths of her family. It was family or at least one of them was. Alfred, Cousin Alfred, wanted her dead. Because . . . because of Robin Hood . . . Because her stupid sister was dating Robin Hood. The man walking beside Alfred was none other than the sheriff of Nottingham. That man was Prince John's lackey. He was always having the sheriff doing the dirty work or having the sheriff order some mindless drone to do it.

Alfred and the Sheriff were still talking quietly as they passed her hiding spot. She couldn't believe this. "Oh my God," she whispered.

Her cousin whirled around at the noise. "Did you hear that?" he questioned his companion worriedly. Apparently the discussion of killing his family had taken a toll on his nerves. He was more than a little antsy.

The Sheriff frowned slightly, "No. I didn't hear anything." He glanced at Alfred, "You need to calm down a bit. It's not like I'm asking you to kill your mother. Just a old geezer and his two offspring: an idiot and a midget." Lily fumed silently. She was so not a midget and Marion wasn't an idiot. She just wasn't all that bright. If dating Robin Hood had proved anything it was that.

"I guess," Alfred responded. He still didn't look all that comfortable but he was starting to relax.

'He's coming to terms with killing his family,' Lily mentally seethed.

Lily waited noiselessly for the two men to pass before running upstairs to her sister's room where her sister was humming and brushing her hair. "Marion! Marion!"

Marion turned to look at her little sister before turning uninterestedly back to her brushing, "What is it, Lily?"

"Alfred! And the Sheriff! They were talking! Downstairs!" Lily all but shouted, not really making any sense.

"You were eavesdropping again. You should leave people alone," Marion said pointedly referring to Lily's previous interruption.

"Look! Just because I walked in on you and Robin exchanging spit is no reason to ignore me! Someone is trying to kill us!" Lily raved.

"We were not 'exchanging spit,' we have more class than that. We were kissing," Marion almost huffed but she was too dignified for that. "And who, pray tell, is trying to kill us?"

"Alfred and the sheriff!" Lily shouted.

"Lily, have you been eating those plants again? Besides no one is trying to kill you or me. Try living in the real world."

Lily glared at her, "I wasn't eating any plants. The stable boy told me that they smelled really good so I went to sniff some. And fine, if you want to _die, _then be my guest!"

"Lily! Honestly! No one is trying to kill you! Get over it! Do something helpful for a change," Marion exclaimed finally losing her temper.

Lily narrowed her eyes and stormed out of the room. "I'll just tell Robin. He knows the Sheriff is trouble. He'll believe me!" she hurried out to the stables where she secretly changed into the men's breeches she had stolen from the stable boy before tacking her horse, Awesome Blossom, and leading her out.

"Come on, Rose," she clucked softly, using the horse's stable name. She quickly tightened the girth and fixed the stir-ups before climbing onto a stump and then on to the tall chestnut's back. She gathered the reins in her hands before urging the horse into an easy canter.

The normally long walk to Sherwood was fairly quick by horseback so in about forty-five minutes she reached the edge of the woods. Lily slowed Rose down a trot and posted lightly as the sun disappeared behind the canopy of leaves. The rays of light sifted through the leaves making an almost fairy tale feel to the whole forest. Sherwood was pretty. Too bad the scum of England inhabited it. Well excluding Prince John, her former cousin Alfred (She was so going to do something about being related to him), and the sheriff. Well and the others she was sure existed. Though she supposed Robin wasn't all that bad.

Soon the trees became pretty thick and she had to slow Rose down even more until they were walking. Lily purposely crashed the branches around her, making as much noise as possible so Robin would come and try to rob her before realizing that it was she.

'What is taking him so long?' she muttered mentally to herself. 'I'm being extremely loud. More so than usually."

Eventually an arrow flew past her head and embedded itself in a tree next to her. "Robin!" she cried out gleefully. "About God damn time."

"Lily?" Robin Hood questioned.

"Yes!" she responded.

"Hmm. I didn't think you were one to swear," his eyes curved in a smile. "Talk bombastically maybe. But swearing? Never!" his eyes teased her even though she had only met him recently.

"This is serious! I overheard the Sheriff talking to my cousin this morning!" she replied frantically.

"The Sheriff?" his eyes narrowed. "What were they talking about?"

"You! And that they have to find out where you're hiding and things like that. I told Marion and she didn't believe me so I came to find you! I don't know what-"

"You talked to Marion about this?" Robin interrupted. A lovesick expression overcame his features before he took control over his body once more.

"Yes," Lily replied cautiously.

"Well, I trust Marion and I think she knows what is going on in your house a little better than you do."

"What?" Lily exclaimed. She did not like this. Not one bit. "Look, genius. I know this might be hard for you grasp but see this," she pointed to her ears as she continued, "they work. I can hear, you know! I can tell when someone says, 'kill the whole lot of them when you get the information.'" Lily's eyes nearly released the tears that had built up at the remembrance of the fact that someone who she had known all her life wanted to kill her and her family. She glared at Robin Hood, "If you won't help me or at least believe me than I'll just have to deal with this on my own. She wheeled Rose around before kicking her into a canter despite the thick foliage.

She urged Rose faster and faster as a few loose tears ran down her face. She tried to forget that her own cousin plotted her murder, her sister didn't believe her, and the person who should completely understand didn't. Rose broke into an all-out gallop as she leapt out of the woods into the bright sunlight. Her eyes were blinded for a second and she quickly pulled Rose to a stop.

A little shaky, she grinded her teeth at a final decision: if they weren't going to help, then she was going to save all their sorry arses. She blushed slightly at the harsh mental statement but decided it was the best thing to do. She would have to save her family from the Sheriff, Alfred, and . . . and themselves.

She turned Rose toward the manor and broke into an easy canter. She hoped that whatever happened she wouldn't be too late.

Lily tied up Rose's reins, loosened the girth, and pulled up the stir-ups before heading into her home. She brushed her hands on her breeches before realizing what she was wearing. Oh shoot!

"Lily!" a voice spoke from behind her.

A feeling of dread overcame her as she turned to face her cousin, "Alfred?" All the memories overwhelmed her.

-:-

_"Alfred!" a miniature Lily yelled as she chased her cousin from her room. "I'm busy!"_

_"Busy working on my birthday present?" Alfred teased._

_"Alfred!" Lily shrieked. "You stinker! Maybe I shouldn't give it to you!"_

_The younger Alfred pouted, "Hey, you can't do that!"_

_"Watch me!" was Lily's quick response. But of course Alfred had gotten his present. With a little extra surprise so he'd still be shocked._

-:-

_Lily, Marion, and Alfred lay in a field behind the manor. Lily was only four years old while Marion was eight and Alfred was six._

_"Alfred? Marion? You won't ever hate me, right?" Lily asked softly._

_Marion and Alfred turned sharply to her. "What do you mean?" Marion softly questioned._

_Alfred was a little more to the point, "Lily, we could never hate you. You're too cute to be hated!" He then rolled onto her and began tickling her without mercy._

-:-

More memories pushed and prodded at her mind as she stared in fear at her cousin. Quickly and almost instantaneously her expression changed to her normal cheerful expression, "Did you want something?"

Alfred's gaze seemed to pierce right through her, "What are you doing with men's clothes on?"

Lily gulped. "I . . . uh . . ." She looked around for an excuse. Alfred stepped closer to her.

"Hey, I promise I won't tell. Can I ask you something?"

Lily looked into his eyes. Maybe it wasn't Alfred she saw this morning. Maybe she just had made a mistake. Perhaps she thought someone else was he due to the bad lighting. "Sure."

"What do you know about Robin Hood?"

-:-

**Written: Unknown **

**Revised: July 23, 2005**


	7. The Prankster's Way

**Little Sisters Have No Fun  
Chapter 7: The Prankster's Way  
By: AquaDreamingz**

**_Author's Note:_**_ Yeah! Revisions are over! Chapter 9 will be coming out soon._

-:-

Lily gaped at her cousin, "Robin Hood? You're asking _me_ about Robin Hood? Why should I know anything about him? Are you calling me a thief?" Her outwards demeanor looked shocked and horrified and inside wasn't much different but for different reasons. Her mind was reeling and her mouth was babbling and rambling and that was going to make him suspicious, _He doesn't know, does he? Well I was expecting this . . . but not so . . . blunt. Make your mouth stop moving! _She finally overcame her shock and wisely shut her mouth.

Alfred watched Lily carefully. She didn't seem to be lying but Lily had always been clever. "I thought maybe you'd know something. You've lived here all your life and thought maybe you tell me about him. Mighty brave, don't you think, how he stands up to the sheriff and all. That man has a lot of guts. Thought maybe you could tell me a thing or two. Heard the legends but you have to admit, it's fascinating it is." _Good lie_, Alfred patted himself on the back, which received a rather startled look from Lily. _Oops._ "I had an itch," he tried to explain. Lily raised an eyebrow but otherwise said nothing before answering his previous questions,

"Oh sure, I've heard stories. Who hasn't but I've never met him, thank God. Otherwise I might not be here or if I was I would be horseless and penniless," Lily lied quickly and almost effortlessly. _Its a sin. Lying to family. To save a life though. That helps, doesn't it? _She smirked inwardly. _Though its not like I've never sinned before. _She fondly remembered the time when Marion had eaten her piece of the pie, what do you know I never knew she had it in her, and Lily had gotten back at her by throwing all her undergarments in the river. Marion had never really stopped blushing and the village boys haven't forgotten either. _(-)_ Maybe that was it. She couldn't fight. She couldn't use a bow and arrow. But she could prank. And well.

Alfred's eyes narrowed slightly. He couldn't bloody well tell if she was lying or not. That girl was more trouble then she was worth. _So much her being easy to read and talkative_, Alfred mentally groaned. Out loud though, he muttered his thanks and dismissed himself. _Stupid girl. I was brilliant though. Quick thinking I am. Maybe I can find someone else to . . . _ His mind trailed off as he came up with a brilliant plan and it actually _was_ a good plan.

Lily breathed a little easier and took off to find out how she was going to solve this little problem of Robin's. And Marion's. And bloody hell, it was her problem too. _Damn._

-:-

Lily quietly snuck out of Alfred's room. He wasn't there. He had gone out with her father earlier that evening for a ride to oversee the lands. It unnerved her but Alfred wouldn't kill yet. He didn't have the information. Not that Father had any anyways but he didn't know that.

She could feel the adrenaline pounding through her veins and it excited her. A prank always did: the act of pulling a trick on someone, a battle of wits and cleverness. She was a fox. She was sly, cunning, and good at it. Everything went into overdrive as she put her natural instincts to work to make sure the coast was clear.

_Can't wait till he finds that little 'surprise'_, Lily grinned. Alfred was going to find out that he couldn't screw around with her life and her fam- immediate family. Or their outlaw boyfriends.

-:-

Lily hid in her room until Alfred came home and the prank was unleashed. She didn't want Marion to find out what she was up to and ruin it. That would be horrible. And she was doing it for her too! She'd put a stop to her plan and then Alfred would get away with his horrible plot and kill Robin. And her. And her family. Alfred must be stopped and so what if she got a little bit of fun out of it as well. It was for the well being of all of England.

She bit her lip a bit. _I do hope everything turns out okay._ Her hands moved nervously over her dress. Even though it was home and "casual" there were still two petticoats, an underskirt, and the dress itself. Not to mention those slippers. They weren't too bad but she was feeling a bit more confined. Her fingers went up to her necklace around her neck and rubbed the ornament hanging from it. Her wide sleeves felt heavy, as did her heart. _Everything has to turn out okay._ She didn't know what would happen if anything happened to her family. If anything happened to her father... _My life would be ruined. Marion and I have no other living relatives._

Lily sighed softly. _This is all Robin Hood's fault. And Marion's. And Alfred's. And the sheriff's. But mostly Prince John's. Lousy jerk._ Her eyes narrowed. _Bloody arse._

A door closing alerted her to Alfred's return. She rose to her feet and began to pace. Her ears listening to the footsteps moving quickly up the stairs. Down the hallway now. Another door opening. A screech filled the air. A rather girly one too, Lily noted evilly. Alfred's voice flowed to her ears, "LILY!"

_Oops. Maybe that wasn't such a great idea._

**-:- **

**Written: Unknown  
Revised: August 3, 2005**


	8. Getaway

**Little Sisters Have No Fun **

**Chapter 8: Getaway**

: 

**_Author's Note:_**_ I'd like to dedicate this chapter to Chrissy, my greatest beta reader! Thanks so much!! Also the prank is revealed in this chapter. Did I do Lily justice?_

: 

Lily grimaced. She could hear Alfred yelling her name. _Why does he always assume that it's me?_ She rolled her eyes. _Oh yeah…_

She looked outside the door and what do her eyes see but a homicidal Alfred barreling down the corridor. His destination: her room. His plan: most likely to kill his little cousin. 

_He deserves it._ Realizing that the man with murderous intentions was rather too close for comfort to her location, she slammed the door shut and leaned up against it. 

_Well at least he's not going to really kill me. Oh wait yes, that is on his agenda, isn't it._Suddenly the prank did not seem like that great of an idea. Scratch that, it seemed like a really, really bad idea. _But why is he overreacting? I always play pranks on him and his never tried to kill me... or appear this mad anyways._He always burst out laughing and played a prank back on her. 

_Crap! Scheiβe! Shitmatta! Crap!_ Shivers ran up her spine as she glanced around her room for an escape route, she spotted a chair nearby that she grabbed and stuck under the doorknob. Moving quickly to the window, she silently cursed the fact that she lived on the second floor. _Damn it._ She also cursed the fact that she was wearing heavy dresses and petticoats. _Stupid dresses. Stupid corsets. Stupid being a girl!!_ She smirked. _Though it's a hell of a lot better than being a boy!!_

Lily looked out of the window and smiled. _What, in the nine hells, are the odds of that?_ She grabbed the branch of the tree and hoisted herself onto it. The door was creaking as Alfred pounded and rammed against it and Lily knew she had to hurry. Her hands moved to the branch above the one she sat on and used it as leverage to pull herself to her feet. 

Thankfully, it was a sturdy branch and she was able to walk to the trunk. Back in her room, wood broke and a door scattered. Alfred angrily stepped onto the threshold. 

"Lily!" Alfred screeched. 

_I can't believe he's that angry over that little prank. It was a good prank though._ She smiled evilly at the memory: 

: 

_She slipped into Alfred's room with her supplies in a small bag that was slung over her right shoulder. She turned back to the door and quietly closed it behind her. Her eyes looked over Alfred's room, assessing it before an evil grin lit up her face. She began to pull things out of the bag. _

: 

_Looking over her handiwork, Lily grinned in triumph. Alfred's bed now was dyed a horrifying shade of pink along with the majority of his clothes. The other clothes were colored a variety of girlish colors including purples and light blues and yellows. The variety made the room look like something out of one of those horrifying Easter and Spring parties her father made her go to. In addition, little hearts decorated the edges between the ceiling and walls and the collars of his shirts. That had taken awhile but she decided that the effect made it worthwhile. It was the work of a master prankster and was truly horrifying if you were boy trying to prove that you're a man. And Alfred was no man at least in any normal girl's eyes. On his bed she placed a heart shaped card with a drawing (she was quite the artist when she wanted to be) of Robin Hood on it. Along the edge of it she wrote 'Long live Robin Hood! Down with Prince John, the Sheriff and all his **lackeys**!' _

_She found it bloody ironic. And she loved it. _

_As she left, her bag was a lot heavier… with his underwear. Shame she couldn't see his reaction when he went to get dressed on the morrow. _

: 

Of course, he probably hadn't realized that they were missing yet. _Loser._ But the best pranks revealed themselves at the opportune moment. 

Lily looked back into her room. Their eyes locked. She froze. _**He knows.**___

: 

_She pulled a red heart out of the bag of supplies. It had taken a little while longer to prepare than other supplies had. She kissed it and grinned with a sinister aura surrounding her. One thought filled her mind: Evil Alfred was going down. She gently set it down on the bed. And with that the room was complete. She stepped back to survey her work._

: 

She jumped out the window. Her skirts caught some of the air but she still fell fast. She landed cat-style and looked up and the window. Alfred's face appeared filled with anger and loathing and they darkened his features. 

"Lily!" 

She scrambled to her feet and ran to the stables. If she could get Rose, she could get away. 

"Lily! Daddy's dead! You're next, little cousin! You're going to be dead! I promise you! I know you know!!" 

She turned to look at him. "Congratulations, genius! You're scheme isn't going to work and you messed with the wrong sister's boyfriend!" She turned and continued to run with out slowing she grabbed a saddle and a bridle. As fast as she could she tacked Rose who, being the intelligent animal that she was, sensed the urgency and stood still while Lily quickly dealt with the buckles and latches. She jumped onto the saddle and adjusted her skirts while leading Rose out into the yard. Once there she saw Alfred running out into the yard. 

_What a slow piece of crap!_

She kicked Rose into a canter and they took off. A couple strides later a full gallop broke out. They ran to Sherwood together. Well sort of, Lily was sitting on Rose's back trying not to fall off due to her stupid skirts. 

They broke into the woods and were soon intercepted by Robin Hood and his _merry_ men. She gasped out her story and when she got to the window scene she broke out in tears. 

Her father was dead. 

Her only living guardian was dead. 

All she had was a stupid sister who everyone thought was perfect and her outlaw boyfriend. 

She was so screwed. 

She might as well have been all alone for what they were worth. 

She just wanted to go back to be normal. _Stupid, stupid Cousin Alfred!__ Stupid Sheriff! … … Stupid Prince John!!!!_

Somebody had to solve this. And it probably was going to be her. 

Prince John is going down. Hell yeah!! 


End file.
